Let the torment begin.

The worst 3 months of the year? January, February, March. After New Years is over, you get to endure 3 miserable months of frigid weather and little to look forward to. Sure, there's Valentines Day. But that's a very biased (and for many, brutal and unforgiving) holiday. Sure, there's St. Patrick's day too, but in college every day can seem like St. Patrick's day.

I can feel my winter rut coming on, and there's nothing I can do to stop it. Not only am I broke for having every single person in my family celebrate their birthday between the months of November and January, but the end of winter break has left me feeling unproductive. Since school is a 40 minute drive from my family's home, I am always the last one to leave at the end of breaks. I feel like I don't belong in this ghost town anymore. I feel like I'm in limbo.

That on top of the utter sex drought I am about to embark upon should be plenty to keep me good and ornery for weeks to come.

The only things that make me really feel better when I'm like this are shopping (regrettably I am an avid practitioner of retail-therapy, despite my general disdain for acting like a high-maintenance bitch), writing (hence the reason for the blog; I wouldn't do this if I was merely interested in being "discovered"), abusing my body (not in the self-mutilating sort of way, more like the alcohol-poisoning sort), and sleeping (best cure for anything). Between school and work, my life will be on a rotating cycle of the 4 activities i mentioned above, with an emphasis on the last three.

Why am I bitching into my black hole of a blog about this? Because I'm supposed to be staying on top of my shit. And I can't let the majority of people in my life know that I just want to hibernate until April. It's not that I don't have plenty of people to talk about this to, I just tend to bottle up my emotions when I can. I can't stand it when people wallow around in self-pity all the time and I refuse to become one of those people.

So that's my rant. I'm not sure if I was going somewhere with this or just needed to open up a vent in my emotional vault. I do feel better though, and I swear to myself that next post will be a complete 180 on the mood spectrum.